Refactoring the question as requested:
I'm doing a small home automation project. The circuit I'm trying to control using an ESP8166 is this:
LOAD: 220VAC / 1A
To be able to control the circuit using the ESP and the mechanic switches, I need to plug a 4-way switch in the middle. Something like this:
My idea is to use a latching DPDT relay with crossover NO/NC, like this:
So, in the end, I'll have something like this: (minimal schematic, missing protection circuits, external source for relay, relay in's, ..)
My main question is: Is this correct ?
My second question is: Is it possible/better to use a mosfet+bridge rectifier instead of the relay since 1. a mosfet switches faster, 2. the relay wears-off faster